(Source: yeoshin)

geometricdeathtrap:

metallikato:

generallegendary:

metallikato:

jewelstaites:

how to give a good handjob

  • bop it
  • pull it
  • twist it
  • harder
  • better
  • faster
  • stronger 

You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!

Cha cha real smooth

none of you ever touch a penis

(Source: daenerystargayren)

grreenleaf:

do u ever get a sharp stabbing pain somewhere on ur body and wonder who the hell made a voodoo doll of u this time bc its getting old and im tired of dealing iwth it  god F;uckign damn it

(Source: luuuvbug)

wewewe-soexcited:

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.

The only creatures that are evolved enough to convey pure love are dogs and infants.

vufus:

"Moon Sugar"
Artist: Kristin Eck 

vufus:

"Moon Sugar"

Artist:  

artmonia:

Surrealist Photographs by American Photographer Brooke Shaden.

obscurebourgeoisie:

obscurebourgeoisie:

don’t buy colgate whitening toothpaste

it says guaranteed whiteness in 14 days

15 days have come and gone

and i am still asian

this is probably the funniest thing i’ve ever said in my life, which is honestly such a low benchmark for humour i’m so sorry

(Source: quasidrome)

obscurebourgeoisie:

obscurebourgeoisie:

don’t buy colgate whitening toothpaste

it says guaranteed whiteness in 14 days

15 days have come and gone

and i am still asian

this is probably the funniest thing i’ve ever said in my life, which is honestly such a low benchmark for humour i’m so sorry

(Source: quasidrome)